Shavous

One big custom on Shavous is to eat dairy meals.  In a family with 2 kids allergic, 1 lactose intolerant, and 1 who dairy is an EE trigger thats almost a joke.  Oh, and mommy avoiding it cause of nursing.  Over the years I have gotten good at faking it.  For the first time ever we decided to attempt the dairy meal at shul once the Rabbi told me I could bring food for the kids.  This is the one community meal that has scared the daylights out of me.  Hot dairy, cold dairy, frozen dairy, melting dairy, dairy all over little kids, dairy all over adults.  EEEKKKS!  Let me run and hide my daughter!  

When F was about 3 she was at shul one Shabbos and she was playing with a little baby.  She has been very allergic since an infant but that day we learned how beyond sensitive she was.  I was home with baby ML and my husband had taken the boys and F to shul with him.  The baby had drank a dairy bottle of formula which we did not realize was dairy.  His mom had cleaned him up afterwards as well.  Half an hour or so later F was playing with him.  The mom noticed her hiving up and got my husband right away.  I was gotten and she was epied.  We called 911 and were whisked away after 2 epis, prednisone, and benadryl when the ambulance finally arrived.  An amazing neighbor later brought me ML to nurse.  They had her on oxygen to help her breath, ivs, and she was puking.  The reaction started in her eye.  After playing with the baby whose hands were dry she had rubbed her eye. The dairy protein got into her eye's mucous membrane.  Her eyes rolled back a few times but thankfully she did not loose conscientiousness.  So a Shavous meal we thought would never be possible.

MEB as well is allergic though we don't know if she will be as sensitive as F.  We eliminated it at 10 days old as a suspicion.  Two weeks later I slipped and had pizza.  Our wonderful allergist Dr. W at Hopkins told me to eliminate it for another four months and try again eating it with high hopes that she would be fine by this point.  

T loves dairy!  LOVES it.  As a baby couldn't get enough of it.  We had him scoped for other reasons, thinking he had EE like MEB.  That came back negative however the test DID reveal that he is extremely lactose intolerant.  UGH!!!!!!!!  The one food group I could count on.  

ML for now is not allowed to have dairy.  We don't know if it is a true trigger for his EE but it was on the list of things we had to eliminate and eventually one day might get to trial back in his diet.  For now though we have to strictly avoid it because it could be a true trigger.

So, I made non-dairy mac and cheese with my daiya pareve cheese, pareve cheesecakes galore with toffuti cream cheese, ML safe lasagna, and lots more.  The kids were so excited.  As well I got them bagels from Heaven Mills in BP, NY.  Boy were they excited.  For the ice cream party for the kids after the 10 commandments we brought our ever so amazing SoDelicious vanilla coconut ice cream.  The one and only ice cream F can have not homemade.   

Off we went to shul.  We sailed through the ice cream party.  No reaction despite the loads of ice cream clad kids.  Double wammy for F as she is also deadly allergic to chocolate.  They had their ice cream slightly away from the rest of the group and off they went to the playground.  Kids were wiped down before they went off to the playground.  Epis were kept close.  Not taking to many risks!  The meal came.  We put the kids at the end of a table.  We decided it was the best time to trial dairy with MEB.  It had been 4 months.  So, I made that one dairy meal worth it!  Boy did I enjoy it.  Not a single hive showed up to play, no breathing issues, no swelling, no eczema flares, no reaction with F.  Amazing!  Even a year ago I never would have thought to attempt it.  In part she has grown and matured so much.  In part the shul has become to amazingly careful and understanding.  MEB did react.  Congestion and more.  A clear cut fail.  

It was an awesomely successful day though even with MEB reacting.  F was able to navigate the real world- people will be eating her allergens around her for the rest of her life.  She was able to do it safely and with maturity.  MEB gave us an answer.  No more, is she really or isn't she.  Yes, she is.  She still has time to outgrow and maybe she won't be as bad as her sister.  But hey, answers we can work with.  ML was a mentch and didn't try to sneak cheese or other dairy which is becoming a problem with him- sneaking foods he can't have.  T while sad didn't have a panic attack nor did he break down in tears which has happened before when he feels left out.  They had their food which they declared Top Chef worthy and had a grand time playing in the playground with their friends.  

We can do this.  

Reading

I am a bookaholic.  I read through books faster than my husband can buy them for me.  I read nursing, cooking, in the bathroom, when I should be sleeping, etc... basically I spend a lot of time with a book in my hand.  I love learning about others, creating imaginary worlds, and having friends who I can rely on.  Its been an interesting ride with the kids so far considering reading is so much a part of my life.

Z we were told when he was five has a language processing issue.  Basically it all goes in and gets locked in his brain and we haven't really found the key to help unlock the amazing amount of knowledge he has.  With four years of language therapy he is making amazing process.  When we had that first meeting after testing we were told he might never read.  It was devastating news for me but I knew he was a hard worker and lets show them how wrong they are.  He slowly DID learn to ready but it was frustrating.  A lot of tears and a lot of rages later he discovered Out Of Egypt which is a graphic novel about the Passover story.  He fell in love.  He found it soothing so when he felt out of control, he would take it and start reading.  Our copy has been read so many times its about to fall apart.  We have now gotten him the other two books by the company which are getting just as much love.  Still, while he was doing better he was not reading on grade level.  He also had a huge anxiety attack when a book had chapters.  So, right before Passover this year I took a gamble.  I noticed he liked the simple children's books I had put on the kindle we had gotten for Channukah.  So, for his last book report I put the book on the kindle instead of getting him a regular copy.  They were reading historical fiction so I put All of a Kind Family on the kindle and let him know it was one of my all time favorite series of books.  He was so excited as he read more and more of it because it was about a Jewish family and he could relate.  Before he knew it he was half way through the book!  Only at this point did I get a copy through our public library so he could read as well on Shabbos and at school.  It was the hammer than broke the brick wall that was stopping him from reaching grade level.  Today Z came to me and asked if I could put Harry Potter on the kindle.  He knows its a hard book but he is excited to ready it!  So I did and he is two chapters in already.  Amazing!

T took naturally to reading.  Despite what his teachers say, he has been reading since mid-K at home and loves reading.  The only thing is, T only loves reading Dick and Jane.  He is completely capable of reading harder books.  He does at home because I don't let him have the Dick and Jane books until he has read a bit of a harder book.  Who knows why he is stuck on Dick and Jane.  It could be because he does not like to work hard and it is a bit of work for him to read other books.  He is jealous of Z though reading on the kindle touch given to us by an amazing family friend.  So, I am fully taking advantage of it and made him a deal.  If he reads harder books, he too can read on the kindle.  He did follow through a bit in the car on the way back from Chicago.  We shall see if it continues.  Will he be reading Dick and Jane for the rest of his life?!

F is a completely different character.  She loves books as much as me.  She never can get enough when I read to them. Since she was  tiny she would take books in her room and look through them pretending she is reading them and making up stories.  When she got a little bigger and knew some letters she would sit and point out the letters.  Now that she knows all the letter sounds she is desperate to ready.  So, Passover I took one of T's Dick and Jane books despite his screaming and crying and sat down with F.  She rocked it. F though has a tic where she gets stuck on words she has heard or is saying and repeats them over and over.  Never in a million years did I see what was coming next.  She was sounding out a word- c-o-m-e, come, and repeated it.  I told her F, its good, you said it correctly.  For over half an hour over and over c-o-m-e, come.  When she finally got out of the tic she still kept going.  Until the next time it happened.  She has tried reading a number of times and this tic is front and center.  She is frustrated beyond.  She is determined though- she loves books way to much.  For now, the text to speech on the kindle is her new best friend.